Monday, January 31, 2011

just one layout

i decided that digital scrapbooking is the only way i will go now. after i got what i had out and organized, i realized that i'd rather do digital. my mom gave me a few things so i got my stuff back out and organized again. still felt the same way. paper stuff is so expensive. well to me it is. when i think of what $25 will get me, i cringe. i can get 4 to 5 digital kits for that much and use them over and over. at .70 and up for one sheet of paper, it adds up fast. plus the space. so digital is the way i am going to go. i thought i could never part with paper but i can. it won't bother me at all. i just can't see paying money for paper supplies any more. i love too much of it and would want it all lol. i thought maybe i would get some new stuff and see if that changed my mind. then i thought nah...just wasting my money.

so, here is a digital layout i did yesterday:
i want to take more pictures and document more. liam is saying more words. i want to remember when and what he said. i wish i would have recorded more in his first year. i will make up for it! since it looks like he will be the only child i am going to start going crazy with the pictures, especially with the new camera!

in other news...they are calling for a lot of snow. like 12 to 16 inches. eeks! no. i am not a snow person. i like it for maybe one day then i want it gone. it is pretty for that day that i don't mind it but after that nope...i don't want it. i'd rather have sunny, warm days. maybe i should move south...way south!? we don't get that much bad weather thank god so i will stay where i am at for now. but that may change depending on how much snow we get tomorrow lol. i know i could never live in the east/northeast. ever!!!!

stay warm!

Sunday, January 30, 2011

simple things #6

here is my photo for this week. i got a new camera, a canon rebel xs, so i had to take some pictures of the dude. i love this one with his eyes closed, a smile and two little teeth barely showing. love!!!
join us at rebecca's blog, click on the graphic, to share your own simple things!

unseen blessings

we never know when things are going to happen...good and bad. i'm not one for surprises and change. thursday we got quite a surprise. my ex is suppose to pay for the jeep. it is my property, he is paying for it. it is in the divorce papers that way. well thursday evening the jeep got repo'd. (thank god it isn't in my name, just by law via divorce papers) yeah...i was not a happy woman. no warning what so ever. all the sudden we are without a car. no way to get to work. no way to get anywhere if we needed to. i don't know if i have ever been so mad at someone as i am him.

thankfully we were able to get another car, a 2008 pontiac g6, on friday. there were a few things wrong with the jeep. things that i don't know if we would be able to afford. not major things but i am sure before long they would be. the g6 still has factory warranty. still plenty of years and miles left before it is up. i didn't know if i would be able to go to a car after having a jeep and an explorer. but the way gas prices are, that made it a lot easier to make a decision to get a car with good gas mileage. there is more room inside than the jeep. funny but there is, especially in the backseat. and yes, easier to get liam strapped in with that room to move back there.

yes, this was a blessing in disguise. i had thought from time to time about getting a newer vehicle but didn't want the car payment. oh and luckily this happened right when we got our tax refund. the same day we needed a car we got our refund. i think god had a little work to do in that. it helped us put a good size down payment on the car. :) the refund will help us pay a few bills off so we can comfortably afford this car. now as long as nothing major comes up.... lol

i also want to point out that i have the most amazing inlaws. thank you for helping us and coming to our need thursday night, laura! i think to myself how lucky and blessed i am and i can't help but have a huge grin on my face. i feel peace. i feel content. i feel happy. i know we are put through things to make us stronger. i know those years i wasn't happy helped me to be who i am today. i am stronger. i am more determined. and i believe it was all worth it. in the end it always is, right?

Wednesday, January 26, 2011


he loves to read! he loves it when i read to him. every once in a while i will see him picking up one of his books and looking through the pages. i hope he continues that as he gets older. i can not wait to take him to the library soon!

this is my favorite picture. it is as if he is reading it and understanding and thinks it is funny.

i hope he is smart like his daddy! :) i think he will be.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Sunday, January 23, 2011

powdered donuts and other things

yes he loves powered donuts. i probably give him way too many but he knows when to stop. oh trust me he does! he throws them when he is done. he throws anything when he is done eating. so he never over eats on donuts or blueberry muffins...he favorites! who can resist that powered sugar face? :)

so tomorrow we find out if he needs tubes in his ears. i think i need one in my left ear. it's been plugged up since sept. other than the month in a half where it wasn't. going to make an appointment with dr. baker for myself tomorrow. i'm tired of not being able to hear. (and i am sure everyone is getting tired of "what?") he is working on 4 teeth. he sticks his thumbs in his ears when his teeth are bothering him. we did take him to the dr to make sure the ear infection was gone since he was doing this. they look great. dr said it was due to teething.

the kid loves car rides. he loves looking out the windows and watching everything go by. he used to hate being in his car seat but i think he is finally realizing there is so much to see. he never wants to miss anything. he observes. he takes everything in. he has to see it all!

he really likes looking out the front window. the seats are spread out enough that he can see right through. i like to look back at him in the rear view mirror. sometimes he sees me and laughs. makes me smile.

he still has issues getting strapped in. i don't think he likes that part of the seat. but once he is in he is ready to go. and if you stop the car.....well you better get moving again is all i can say! thank god the carhops at sonic are fast!!!

yep...that's my son. he's awesome.

simple things #5

this week we got some snow. not as much as other places, thank god! i think we got 1 to 2 inches...more close to one. since i had a couple of hours before work, i dropped eric off and went to starbucks. the camera on my new phone doesn't have a flash, yeah...i know....but i like how this came out. it was pretty bare in there that day but this picture shows how the snow kept everyone away and how a good cup of coffee can make all the snow seem ok. yes...the 1 to 2 inches of snow.....hey....i don't like snow, ok?!

catching up

wow, the last couple of weeks has been crazy. i feel like today is the first time i have actually had a full day at home. there is lots to do around the house that i want to get done. i want to bring my paper stuff back in and organize it. maybe do a layout or two. who knows.

i got a card in the mail from my first dept mgr at work. jan is the most awesome, compassionate lady. she sent me a card for miscarrying. she said how she wanted to hug me but didn't want me to cry. i am truly blessed to have so many great people in my life. i made a lot of changes in the last 3 years. i went from a job that i hated with people ragging on my constantly, to a job where i met lots of great people that made a big difference in my life. i miss working in apparel with the girls. hopefully i will be able to go back there soon.

as far as trying for another one.....i may change my mind. i would really like to lose weight first. it just depends on things and if god thinks we should have another. it was god that brought is liam and he will show us if we were meant to have another. off to get stuff done!

Monday, January 17, 2011

needing to play with paper

i decided last year to give up paper scrapbooking and just do digital. i sold about 3/4 of my stuff which was a ton of stuff! i held on to some just in case i changed my mind. and yeah...i did :) i miss it really bad. now that we are back on our feet, especially after the tax return (paying off some bills), i want to start paper scrapbooking again. i will still do digital but my true love is paper and glue! oh i have missed it so much. so tonight i will bring the banquet table back out and organize what i have left. i'm pretty excited! i miss making card as well. i can't wait to get it all set up and to start playing again!

Sunday, January 16, 2011

simple things #4

i was doing good with keeping up with rebecca's simple things each week but the last few weeks....not so good. so let's pick back up shall we!

here is the dude. just having a little fun playing with his sunglasses. he hasn't worn them since summertime. they weren't exactly on his face but i love it anyways!!!

it's all about the dude!

love you lots little man!

Friday, January 14, 2011

oh my heart.

we found out on 1/13/11 that i had miscarried. this is my 4th loss. i didn't think i would have any problems with another miscarriage since i had liam and all came out ok with him. but we don't always know what is going to happen. so i decided that i don't want to get pregnant again. i may change my mind but for now i don't. i can't go through this again. 4 times was enough. the wondering. the waiting. the stress. i hate it all.

i am so thankful for liam. so thankful that i had no complications and he is a healthy toddler today. thankful that god gave me this one child that swells my heart with love and happiness. thankful that i had one time in my life to feel a baby move inside me. thankful that i got to hold my newborn son. thankful for 6 weeks off and bonding time with him. thankful that i am a mother. thankful for our miracle.

there is so much i am thankful for but i still hurt. i wanted to give him a sibling but i don't see that happening. god has other plans and that is ok. maybe this was to show me that we have what we need and what we can afford. i don't know why things happen but they do for a reason. we may not like the reason but we have to get back up and carry on. slowly and slowly time passes and things return to normal.

i am just so thankful for liam jackson!

Sunday, January 09, 2011

6 weeks

yesterday i hit 6 weeks in my pregnancy. still in the very beginning of it but totally feeling all of it. i didn't document much when i was pregnant with liam. i had lost 3 other pregnancy's before and was too afraid. when i was 6 weeks pregnant with him i was scared...totally freaking out scared. i couldn't eat much. my anxiety was up each day. "will i lose this one too? i don't think i can do this."  and so many other phrases went through my head. but each day it got easier and easier. the day when we saw a heartbeat made it all better. but i was still nervous a lot. i didn't want anything to happen to him. then i switched to praying instead of the worrying, which is so much better! god works such great miracles!

so this time around i am trying to be a bit more relaxed. the day i found out i was like "i don't know how to take care of one let a lone two." needless to say the praying started a lot early in this pregnancy! i joined the september 2011 group at i'm meeting women that are over thirty, some are even my age! i'm sharing stories. enjoying it! because no matter what the out come of this pregnancy, it will be my last. i know that is kind of negative to say but at 6 weeks..... i don't think i need to explain, right? but i feel good about this. i feel as if god is adding to our family because we all want liam to have a sibling. i wanted to try to get pregnant again once i lost weight but i never put my mind to it. then one day i am like "oh no....i have that tired feeling again." and it was positive. turned to 2 lines just like the last waiting 3 mintues!

i have energy. i had nausea for a few days, none now. i'm going to enjoy it all! i missed being pregnant. about a month or so after i had liam, i missed him! i missed him rolling around. punching. kicking. yep, going to enjoy each moment and movement this time. hopefully i can find the time to do weekly layouts about what happened that week. i want to do like a project 52. what i really want is to do becky higgins project daily but i'm afraid i will get burnt out with the same stuff for a whole year. someone is doing it but using their own still and page protectors. thinking of that too. all i know is i want and need to document more. i didn't with liam like i wanted to. man, you think "i will be off for 6 weeks. i have so much time." heck no! then you are back to work and then there is definately no time! this time i will make time!

Wednesday, January 05, 2011


so i had a lot i wanted to write on new year's eve. i had been thinking through out the day how much my life had changed this year. (thinking this on the 31st!). how being a mom has changed my life. how i have learned so much. but the news i got on new year's day threw me for a loop! we are having baby #2! due sept 3, 11. we are totally excited. now it took me a day or so for it to sink in. i hadn't lose the weight i wanted after having liam. but god has other plans. i wanted a sibling for him at one point, why not do it now! i'm totally excited and hoping for a little sister!

last year was amazing! i know each year will be better and better. as our family grows, i can't wait to see the changes that are ahead. though there were tough times, i learned a lot and i am still learning. i am not a patient person, slowly but surely i am getting better. the night i found out i was pregnant i was like "i don't know how to take care of one let alone two!" i can do it. i know i can. i didn't think i would ever have liam, so to have him and to be pregnant again is wonderful. i know it is still early in the pregnancy but positivity is all it takes. miracles work themselves out. all i ever wanted was a family and i am tremendously blessed to have eric and liam and now the little one that is constantly growing way down in there :)

in september or august i can't wait for this to happen again:
holding my newborn child!
thank you god!