Wednesday, December 22, 2010

most over looked illness

mental illness is the most over looked illness out there. of course this is strickly my opinion but i feel strongly about after what i have went through in my life. just today i went to urgent care to get a change of prescription because my anxiety is bad but they wouldn't see me for it. i had to go to the er. they did it before so i don't know what the difference is now. i can't see a dr till the 18th of january. i have to call one dr back after the 3rd. my depression and anxiety is getting worse daily but no one seems to care.

read HERE about the statistics of mental disorders in amercia.

suicides are on the rise. i wonder how many of these people seeked out help but was told to wait. how many life's could have been saved if there wasn't the "we can't help you" attitude. what does it take for people to realize this is a real illness that isn't made up. we aren't faking it. but yet no matter what we get the run around.

about a month ago i lost my medication. i called the community health center that i go to and explained that i had lost my meds. they said the dr was out till monday. i asked if i could get at least 3 to get me through the weekend till he got back. NO! they wouldn't let me. it took eric and me calling and complaining (let me tell you it was not a pretty site when i called) to finally get them to give me some meds. i am not a freaking druggie. though the lady today at urgent care made me feel that way. just because i need medication to make each day livable doesn't mean i am any less of a person than anyone else. heck, i am probably better than some because i want to make a difference i what i do to show myself i can do things.

if you have never suffered from anxiety, depression, panic attacks, won't understand. no one will fully understand it unless they live it. it is like saying to someone that has cancer and you never have "oh i understand." no you don't. how can you? don't ever tell me you understand because you don't. no one would understand some of the things i can't do if i told them. if people found god...i would be the laughing stock of work and lord knows where else. and why??? because they don't know anything about it so they choose to make fun of and not learn what it is about.

i am very thankful that i now have in-laws that understand the best they can about this. i lived 16 years with a set that thought i faked it. thought god knows what. i don't know what all they thought but one thing that was mentioned was i would never be a part of their family till i made it to their house. oh yeah....i have agoraphobia too. so with comments like that i never once truly wanted to make it to their house. why should i? with comments like that they didn't care one ounce about me. they never onced wanted to try to learn about it. my god i am so glad those days are over. i spend so many nights crying to myself just wanting to be a part of that family and wondered why they treated me like crap. and the so called sister-in-law that competed with me and made it all worse. jesus, thank you for answering my prayers and giving me eric.

i will win this battle. slowly but surely i am. i am doing things that i couldn't do before. it is a long, slow battle but it can be won. just don't treat me like i am so freak because i am not. it is genetic. it is a learned behavior. two strikes against me. love me and respect met that is all i ask.

if you know of anyone that suffers from any mental illness, try to help them in any way you can. learn about what is going on. be there for them. comfort them. pray for them. never belittle, judge or make fun of them. and you know...that goes for just about anyone in life.

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