almost 6 weeks left till the little man is due to arrive. i'm trying not to complain about things. the house. his room not being done. being really tired. having to work. i am very thankful for all that is going on. if i was pregnancy years before this, i won't have the support that i do now. god knows what he is doing. i pray nearly every night for a healthy pregnancy. for a fast, smooth, painless as possible delivery. so far all has been answered. i truly believe he is a gift from god. i know god believes it is time for me to start living a life i was meant to live. i was in a marriage where i wasn't happy at all. the only thing that made me happy was shopping and buying things that made me happy for a moment. i was tired of it for so many years but too afraid to do anything due to my anxiety disorder.
one thing i have learned from this pregnancy is to watch my thinking. i haven't thought too much about the negative of what may happen. now i did at first because of my history of loses. but now i try not to think about everything. i try to stay positive. even if the house is crap. his room isn't done. etc. there is only so much i can do and i do what i can with the energy i have. at times i want to cry but i don't. i focus on something else. i feel this is a gift from god so i feel guilty if i complain.
my next appointment is the tues before thanksgiving. then in 2 weeks we get a sonogram to see where he is positioned. i hope he is head done. i feel he is. then after that appointment is one week then another week....that last week is dec 22nd! i can't believe how fast this is going. eric did promise me that it all will be done by then. i sure hope so. i am ready to decorate his room and get the crib set up. like i have said a million times...i can't wait till he is here!