ugh, really?

this week did not start off well. we were excited to be on the remodeling team at work, that is about the only good thing that has happened so far. monday we had to put our cat kali to sleep. she stopped eating dry food about 1.5 weeks ago. i thought maybe it was her teeth. she was an older cat, approx 15 years old. so we went to wet food. she ate that good till saturday. she stopped eating it. we thought maybe the dogs were getting to it before her. sunday she would barely move. she would drink water and milk but that was about it. monday when we left for work she was barely moving. her face pretty much laid in the milk i put in a saucer. at lunch we went home to check on her. we thought she was already gone. she was laying in liam's room on her side face up. she was barely breathing. we decided to take her to the vet and let them put her to sleep. we didn't know how much longer it would be. we didn't want her to suffer. we didn't want her dying and laying there no knowing what they dogs would do. i don't think they would hurt her but....

things i remember about her that i loved. she would lay on my back or side while i was in bed. she stopped that a few years ago. but she had to be up there by me, on me. i loved hearing her purr in my ear. she would give dottie, our dog, "kisses." she would lick dottie's head and nose. dottie loved it. she would close her eyes and have this smile on her face. i would say "kali, give dottie kisses." and she would go over and lick her. sometimes if she got close to dottie, dottie would rub her nose against her as if she was saying "i need some kisses." and usually kali would give her some. we think dottie knows she is gone. she was a good, loving cat. she didn't come out when we had company. she did keep to herself a lot. we got a sympathy card from the vet today. i cried again. i so miss her.

oh and....she had a "w" on her forehead lol.

next...liam got his first bad cold/flu. he started with a cough on monday night. nothing too much on tuesday will we got home. we took him to quick care where they said his throat was red. his temp was 100. so we got some antibiotics and were on our way. he threw up three times last night but thankfully  nothing today. today he has ran a fever off and on. the highest up to 101. he doesn't eat much but he does drink and has wet diapers, thank god! i'm not sure if we will go to work tomorrow or not. i am dealing with some sinus stuff myself. throat is a bit sore. not sure if we have the samething or not, though he is worse off than me. so we rest up and get lots of sleep.

eric's family found out that his grandmother has cancer in three places. she will talk to the oncologist next wednesday to see what that game plan is. the cancer on her lung is inoperable. my dad needs to get a biopsy done of his prostate. the numbers are higher than they should be. he is being stubborn and doesn't want to get it done.

seems like a lot at once, huh? not sure why things come on all at once. maybe to teach us something? maybe to show us that we need to slow down and remember that life goes way too fast. that we need to love one another more. we need to be more faithful, hopeful, prayerful and grateful. i know i need to have more faith. i need to give all my worries to god and let him relax me and give me strength. i read this from someone i follow on twitter:
"look what can happen, dear seeker, when you lean your graceful arms toward god in prayer, look at all that amorous light you catch." hafiz
i need to lift my hands to god more often. i need to catch his love and let it radiate on me. not only will it help what is going on in my life, but it will make me a better person, wife, mother and friend. i really do miss going to church. i like listening to joel olsteen on my phone or the computer. i love hearing all the positive he has. all the love and warmth. i miss that from church. i decided i didn't want to really go anywhere because of the people i know that are hypocrites. but i need to realize i am going for me. not for them. to hear the word of god to let it strengthen me and help me grow better. we all need to grow no matter what age we are. weeks like this are a lot easier when god is with you!

scripture and a snapsnot

i wanted to find something that would go with liam's toys that i took pictures of a few weeks ago. i think this will work! :)

simple things

there is nothing like nutella. and then there is nothing like nutella and tiny breadsticks to go with it! the best $1.48 i've spent lately!

what's your simple thing?

happy birthday! (a day late)

happy birthday to the best man in the world.

eric's birthday was yesterday. we all went out to lunch to celebrate. we as in our parents and us. i tried to get a good picture of liam and eric but liam had other things in mind, as usual. i couldn't have married such a better husband and father. god sure has blessed me with him. i love you, babe!

last night we had to go get motrin for his teeth, liam's not eric's :) poor kid. i can not wait till all of his teeth are in. soon i hope! so we drove around to sooth him some. the lights at the ball parks always do. now when he sees the lights he'll either say "lights" or "watch." i could "watch" this sunset all evening!

we left work at lunch today. i had the worse cramping and stomach pains. i could barely walk out to the car. not sure what is going on with my body. got home, laid down and just didn't want to get up. feeling better today. stomach is still hurting. so very odd i tell ya! i don't have my gallbladder so it isn't that. who knows. i didn't know if i was going to have to go to the er or the dr. i was pretty freaked out by it. came from no where. i guess i will chalk it up to aging and out of shape. i can't get younger but i can lose some weight and work out. i can't wait till it gets cooler so we can walk. i am so over this heat. i will not miss summer at all!

this is why we let him eat ice cream at home

because if we didn't feed it to him in a restaurant he would look like this in public:

till he is able to eat without a plastic bag over his body, he'll feed himself ice cream at home.

poor little guy. he had been crying. snotting nose and all. pathetic, huh???

those eyes melt my heart!

even though he can walk just fine, NOW he wants to push this around.

he takes it off the sidewalk and tries to pick it up so it will go.

and then gets mad when it won't.

yep...he has my attitude!

monday pinterest

happy monday!!!

i would love to have this. christmas is coming, hint hint ;)

a really cool way to display candy at a party!

this melts my heart. how sweet is this?

i wanted to do this when i was pregnant but we never got around to it. btw, no link on pinterest for where this goes. the name is on the photo.

i would love to have a camera bag like this. i heart donna downey!

we need this for the house! :)

i really want to do this!!! how awesome!

i soooo want to make this!!!!

and i just may use this idea for liam's 2nd birthday! anyone have a chalkboard?

i really hate by job

friday at work was a very, very bad day. i've been wanting out of that dept since december of last year. the dept mgr doesn't want to work there any more so instead of looking for a different job, she treats us all like crap. friday i had it. i went and talked to the store mgr and co mgr. i was so mad that i was crying. if i cry when i am mad that means i am really pissed off! i told them i was this close to walking out. they have known how unhappy i am up there but will not do anything about it. they know that sales are down up there but won't do anything about it. this woman has treated people like crap for over 4 years in the dept yet they still don't do anything about her.

when i get stressed about one thing and upset like i was, it doesn't leave for a few days. i'm not one to "just let it go." i can't. i don't know how to. things go through my head like: if i was dept mgr i would do this, i would never treat anyone like this, why do they let her get by with this, how much more can i take, i can't just quit i have a son to think of....and much much more. no it isn't easy for me to just forget it. i do not like being treated like crap at a job that doesn't tolerate it but yet they do. other dept mgr have been asked to step down but she....she gets by with murder up there. these other dept mgr, in my eyes, were good people. they worked hard. she walks around the store looking busy. she takes long breaks. she doesn't do anything. she left 2 days of work that she didn't do for me to do on friday. i didn't do it. and it was hard for me not to because i am a hard worker and i knew it needed to be done but i wouldn't do it.

we donate food to feed america. what we can't donate we throw out to be recycled into dog food or fertilizer. i had not been doing the floor for over a week. a bunch of organic, what we throw out to be recycled, was left for me to take out. it sat in the area that i normally work in. lately i have been decorating cakes so i haven't been there. but when i go to do what i was told to do, there it was. you know what this tells me??? that people back there don't get a shit about the bakery or me. they can say their are friends but NO ONE leaves anything else for two certain people but they sure as hell will for me. that really upsets me.

there is  no respect in that place for anyone. well for those two certain people but not me. why? probably because i say it like it is. i get upset and voice my opinion when no one helps me to do things but will help others. i help people when i can. i help them put stuff up. i help in anyway i can but do i get the help and respect that i should? no. so i am stuck in a place that i hate more than anything and no one in mgmt will do a thing about it.

thankfully eric and i are on the remodel team. this week is my last week in the bakery for 6 weeks. i told the store mgr that i do not want to go back there after remodel. i talk to personel about this and she always gives me this grin and says "what's the matter now?" "well, are you sure you like her because wasn't she caught with your son in a freezer doing things they shoudln't have?"

one way or another i will get out of that dept. if i don't i will lose it. i almost did on friday, especially after i was told "i should fire you for not putting the carts away." i was decorating cakes. i had no idea what was going on in the back. i had got in trouble for them not putting "my stuff for the floor" away after they unload it from the pallet. i've told them not to leave it out. no one cares what i say. they know better but they don't care. so after i go to mgr a 2nd time that day, the person that told me they should fire me said it was a joke. yeah...that is something to joke about.

yes, rhonda is worth joking about, right? that is how i feel up there. not fair. not right. but no one seems to care.

this week in pictures

love the app i use on my phone for my pictures. it is called "mytubo." if you like instagram but you are a droid user, you will love this app! yes, it is free! :)

have a great weekend!

unpretty marks

today gypsy mama talked about the unpretty marks on her body and what they mean. so i thought i would talk about mine.

i have a 6 inch scar from a c-section. this scar is a reminder how my little man came into this world. he wouldn't drop. after 7 hours of pitocin, he would not move. i never diliated. nothing. within 35 minutes of them saying it was c-section time, he was born. the baby i prayed and waited 19 years for was finally here! before i had him i had lost 74lbs. i gained all but 20 of it. i hate my stomach but it is also a reminder that he lived there for 9 months as he grew and developed. i try not to get too upset when i see my stomach. i try to remember that i had lost the weight before and can do it again. plus, he is totally worth it seeing how i never thought i would have a child.

other scars: 3 in the ab area due to gallbladder surgery and 3 in the right shoulder due to shoulder surgery. the shoulder sugery was the first surgery i had where they had to cut open. i remember the night before thinking how my scarless skin would be no more. i was pretty bummed. but fast forward ohhhh, 7 years and i don't mind, especially the one below my belly. that is the best scar of all!

i guess this is a reminder that beauty is not just your body. it is your soul. your spirit. your love. your joy. your gratitude. beauty is within!

monday pinterest

today is about christmas! i want to decorate a lot this year. now that liam is old enough to like the things and kinda know what is going on, i want to have fun and decorate! i want to decorate for halloween too!
remember, click on the image to go to the owner's site.

this year i definately want to do the 25 days of christmas. saw this album and ohhhh my!!!!
btw, there is no link on pinterest to who this belongs to. bummer, i want to see inside it!

i'd love to decorate in blue's and red's. love this tree and it's gorgeous decorations!

such a cute idea here. mason jars as snow globes!

and this jar. oh my!!!

very cute pillow for the couch.

fun for the front door.

i have to make these cookies!

these looks simple to make! love the colors!

and last this idea for a picture!

simple things #18

man...it's been a while since i have done this! i like taking a moment to look back at the simple things in our week. a reminder that having a camera handy at all times is beneficial! :)

as we were walking into work i saw the rays from the sun coming up from behind the building. love it!

after all the picutres i take on my phone, i realize now that i need one with more megapixels! :)

what is your simple thing from this week?