a lot going through my mind

this happens when i start to create more. i start thinking of things i want to do. ex...i want to create an esty account to sell my photography. i want to make a mini album. i want to write. i want to take more pictures. right now i have a lot on my heart that i want to get out someone. good stuff. stuff that i have been blessed with. stuff i want to remember. so i am going to take a nap and hopefully work on some stuff when i get up. it is hard to do things when you have a newborn. eric does a lot but we do things in shifts and his shifts are when i sleep, so i feel i need to give him some time when i get up. liam doesn't like the bouncer or swing that much. he will stay in it for maybe 10 minutes and thats it. guess he feels alone.

off to rest my mind so it will be fresh when i come back.

collage

i found this site and found this collage on it. now i have to make one! i've had an 11x17 blank canvas for a while and can't figure out what to use it for. i was going to make an alphabet to put in liam's room but this will be perfect to make and put in the living room.

totally excited that carla is coming down this weekend. she is dying to see liam. speaking of the man, i made him smile today. most awesome feeling. thank god he thinks momma is funny cause that will change when he gets older and is mad at me because i wont let him stay out till midnight on a school night. the man is growing out of his newborn pj's so we need to get him some more. i wonder if he can even stretch his legs that well in them?????

off to work on pictures!

some more scrapping

did some more scrapping last week. tonight i am going to go through all of my paper to see what would be good for boy layouts. i have some baby papers in the back room but no idea where i put it so we'll start with basic area for now. i should probably go through other things as well to see what would be good to use to and keep it all together.

i can't believe that today he is 5 weeks old. i go back to work 2 weeks from tomorrow :(  i am kinda excited to go back to work. i miss it in a way. it will be a lot easier to work without a HUGE stomach in your way when you want to bend over. lol

i took some pictures of him in the carseat yesterday. he was asleep, which is always nice since he hates it. I love the picture of his face! those lips!

he's my angel. i love this kid so much!

dreaming

the last week i have been thinking about  our wedding. ever since we went to the bridal show it has been on my mind. i know where i want to get married. i know who i want to marry us. i know the colors i want. the rest, unknown. we don't have a date set. he hasn't asked lol (but it's a given since we have a kid and we've talked about it). i do know that i will have to do a lot for it since we can't afford a lot. i want to make as much as i can. i do know it will be a simple wedding but not boring simple. it will be awesome i know. so since i am dreaming of our wedding, i went to flickr and put "wedding" in the search to see what i could find. this is what i found:

1. Art Nouveau Wedding Cake Tower, 2. Bridesmaid Sri Lankan wedding, 3. Elise at Wedding Workshop, 4. Viet & Tu's Wedding, 5. MARIAGE / WEDDING : She's Flying, 6. Frank Gehry Wedding Cake, 7. wedding_romania, 8. Wedding Rings, 9. Wedding Butterfly Cookies

i love the idea of the wedding/cupcake in picture 1. i am going to have to remember that one for sure! LOVE picture 3. photography is going to be huge with me. i would love to have something like this taken. i want fx studios but they are way too expensive. *sigh* i will be making my own invitations, just not sure what i will do yet. i will have to borrow aimee's circut to make them. :)

sweet little man

sleeping away. yesterday wasn't a good day for him and for us. it started with a trip out. within a few minutes he was in this full anger cry. he so hates his car seat. it stresses me out because we are in the car and i can't take him out. his face gets dark red. massive tears. snotty nose. breaks my heart. we went to lunch, then to a few other places. i think it through off his sleep some. he was a bit fussy all evening. it was wearing me thin. poor eric, he gets the brunt of it. i took a nap and it didn't help. i was up till 6am and then got eric up so i could get some sleep. i got up around 11 today and feel a lot better.

people tell you it is hard. you believe them but you don't know till you are there and feel it. it is getting better. i just wish he would like his car seat. i hate feeling helpless. hang on man, momma's tryin.

amen, brother!

got this from this blog.

in the red corner, weighing in at....

10lbs 6oz. liam jackson! he had a dr's appointment today that was suppose to be 2 weeks ago but due to 0 degree weather 2 weeks ago and then the dr being way behind last week, today we finally got a chance to see the dr. he is also 21 inches long. man grew 3 inches and gained 3 pounds.

and here is the little big man himself. i tell ya, i love that pillow. he feels like he is being held so he sleeps great in it. such a great buy for 20.97 at walmart :)

i was trying to get a shot of him smiling in his sleep. almost got it. i hope the poor guy doesn't go blind between me and the grandma's taking pictures. :)

just 3 weeks left

man the time is going fast. i can't believe i will be back to work in 3 weeks. we went to the library yesterday and the lady said "ok, these are due back on the 2nd." that's when eric goes back to work. me a week later.ugh. i'm going to miss this time at home with my guys. so from now till we go back to work i will cherish each day and make the most of it. there are still a few things around the house i want to get done before we go back. i need to finish his room. mainly put up pictures. organize where i want things like socks, bibs,etc. stuff i wanted to do before he was born.

i've been scrapbooking like crazy...think i mentioned that before. i am having so much fun working on layouts about liam. here is a simple one i did for his first dr appointment.

i've been doing just paper layouts lately. i'm still collecting digital stuff, which i get here. i love freebies. i don't digital scrap enough to buy a ton of stuff, but i do get a few things here and there. there are a lot of baby, kid papers that i want to get. i have a few things i have gotten over the years but not enough to fill the pages of his album. yesterday i got 75 more pictures developed. tomorrow we are having his pictures taken at walmart. not to sure about that but it is cheap enough that if they come out crappy then i will just buy the small package. i know he will be cute but the rest who knows.

4 weeks old

i can't believe liam is 4 weeks old today. in 3 days one month. 4 week is one month but the 21st is 3 day away :). i love creating layouts of him and our family. sooooo fun! here are 2 more i did over the last couple of days:

just 2 more weeks then eric goes back to work. one week after that i do. i'm not ready to go back. i wish i could afford to stay at home but there's no way i can. he's starting to be more alert. starting to coo more. it's so fun to watch. he focuses more on things around him. his cord is about to fall off. it is barely hanging on. i'm expecting to change his diaper and it will be in there anytime now.

we're going over to stephanie's on tuesday to have a little photo shoot with liam. i really want to get some good pictures of him. going to see about having this guy that used to come into taco station do some of him as well. he has a photography business on the side.

we went to a bridal fair this weekend. omg....everything is so expensive. i really want fx studios to do the pictures but they are over $2,000 to do it. totally out of our price range. may have to ask matt about doing our wedding as well. photos are the most important part for me. fx studios had some albums out. omg...so awesome. i wish we could afford it but that's ok. as long as i have photos to look back on that day, that is all that matters. seeing the prices of things, i realize now that we are going to have to do a lot on our own. wonder if i can make a bouquet? hmmm may have to look up martha stewart and see what she has to say.

a little something

this was fun to make!

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

loving life

its been great being at home and being with my guys. i'll be going back to work on the 9th., sucks but that's life. i love cooking for eric. feeding liam. changing liam. there's times were i go and pick him up needing some major lovin' from him. i so enjoy being a mom.

the little man does NOT like his car seat. it's like a major ordeal each time we are out. it is usually leaving walmart and heading home that he freaks out, today it was after we left home. it stresses me out majorly. i can't do anything for him in the car unless we pull over. he got so worked up today he was sweating. i go in to pay the cable bill and come out to a red, hot, sweaty boy. not fun. so i got his bottle and that made him happy. i don't know what i will do when eric goes to work and i am stuck driving around with just him.

i've been creating layouts left and right. having fun filling up his album. with pictures like this one, it's a blast scrapping him.

yes, he is a major cutey. what did i ever do without him?

i love a good challenge

especially since i am getting back into the swing of things with scrapbooking and need refreshed. i love cheryl's work and was anxious to start her challenges. so far i have only done 2 but its a start. i have so many ideas going through my head for layouts. i love having this creativity! one thing i realized when i was looking through an old scrapbook magazine is that i can look at "all" layouts now, even kid layouts! for the longest time i looked through magazines to get ideas but what like 80% is kid related. i got discouraged and often gave up on ideas. i am so excited to be scrapbooking again. in fact, it was 10 years ago this month that i started scrapbooking. i'm so glad i bought the kit i did at walmart 10 years ago to get me started. though it took me 6 months before i did something, it was worth the wait!

and now for the layouts! the layout about what happened in 2009 that was good or bad. for me it was good! pregnancy and the birth of my first child.

using just patterned paper and embellishements.

i did this one the other day. 3 generations. my mom, me and liam.

i can't believe liam is 3 weeks old already. i am anxious to see what he weighs when we go to the dr on friday. i bet it is close to 9lbs by now if not a bit more. i totally love motherhood. i am getting used to staying up late. getting up at 4 and 6am to feed him. actually i woke up the other night before he did. i love the early morning times. i just stare at him and thank god for him.

some layouts

i'm having so much fun doing layouts of liam. can't wait to get new stuff. there are some really cool new things out there. maybe after bills are paid with the income tax checks, i'll update my scrapbook stash a bit :)

a layout of our dinner before we left the hospital.

the hospital took this picture for the online nursery on their website. they gave us a print off of the pictures they took, this is the one we picked. we also got a card from the hospital.

more to come soon!

eric informed me after i woke up from a nap tonight that liam peed twice in his own face while eric was changing his diapers. the joys of having a boy lol

getting used to it all

wow, how my life has changed. it's 2:37am as i write this. eric and liam are asleep. i finally got liam to sleep. not that he was fussying, he was awake for a while. i am wide awake after taking a long, very much needed, nap.

i'm still trying to get used to all of this. it is a major change in your life and one that i am so happy that is happening.....just wish sleep was easier to come by :) eric and i switch off and on. i am up during the night with him. i sleep in the recliner with him. he sleeps better during the day than at night. i find sleeping in the recliner is easier so i can get some sleep. i'd rather just recline and let him do his thing, rather it be sleeping or being wide awake. he does sleep in the bassinet but we usually end up in the recliner by the time 3am hits.

baby's awake gotta go.

hope

i hope:

to be a good mother to him even though i have anxiety disorder and agoraphobic.

that he doesn't learn my traits and be anxious too.

to make all of his dreams come true.

i can raise him to be the best he can be and not let others influence what he says or does.

i can show him the world in various ways.

he loves me as much as i love him at this moment.

i don't make too many mistakes a long the way.

i can make it all better when he get hurts.

he has his dad's intelligence and not mind.

he lives life to the fulliest with no regrets.

he is my son. all the hope (for what i had hoped for is here at last) i had for me is now his. i want the world for him.

oh how i miss my canon rebel

i wish i would have never sold it but when times are tough you gotta do what ya gotta do. so now these are the kind of pictures i get:

nothing but flash...in your face! guess i will have to play around and see what i can do with it.

really tired of the snow. ever since the 24th there has been snow on the ground. more came last night. we need to get out to the store but i don't want to get him out or me out in this weather. i keep forgetting i had major surgery and that i can't do a lot right now. though i did drive to bo's last night, i have to watch where i walk.

i'm enjoying every day with my little man. we are always up late as he likes to sleep more during the evening and up a lot at night. he's eating good. twice he's had 6oz, but mainly it is 4oz at a time. he feels bigger to me already. i love these little half grins and full grins he has when he just falls asleep. the little noises he makes. melts my heart! eric and i tag team when he is up a lot. yesterday i was so tired, took 2 naps and slept in. today i am more energized though i am like "why am i tired again?" yeah, the "can't get used to the surgery" thing again.

hoping to do some paper layouts tonight. it's been a while since i have. i need to get the id bracelets put on paper and in a album so i don't lose them. here's to a quiet, relaxing night.

happy new year!

liam in his new years onesie. yeah...he's so darn cute!

happy 2010! it's going to be great!